Are you tired of:
· Feeling anxious, scared, and afraid all the time?
· Are you living in fear of ‘something awful happening’ or
· Something that MIGHT happen IF…..’
· Do you keep running the worst possible scenario through your head?
· Do you think “What if…. What if…. What if….
.”Are you just generally scared of ‘doing something wrong’, or not being ‘good enough’ most of the time?
How often do you physically feel the sensations of excess anxiety, stress, panic, dread, fear or overwhelm?
·Nausea, sweaty palms, sweating everywhere, raised heart rate, trembling
· Panicky breathing, butterflies in your stomach, stomach cramps
· Urgent stress IBS – Yes, I do mean that instant bout of diarrhoea.
· A sudden need to urinate… and then again just moments later ‘just in case’
· Increased sensitivity to pain, headaches, muscle cramps, nerves, itching
· Stammering, blushing, stumbling over your words
· Forgetting what you were about to say
· Being unable to ‘hear’ what someone is saying to you because you are in a high state of anxiety and you just feel pressure in your ears
· Inability to concentrate, poor memory, brain fog
· Feelings of complete and utter hopelessness, fear and exhaustion
· Do you just want to stay in bed? Have you had enough? Is it all too much?
If you have answered ‘Yes’ to some of these questions, I have a proven program that will help you find physical and emotional relief and help you to get your life back on track
Change the way you Manage Anxiety, Forever
Relieve Anxiety
To improve your Quality of Life
Enhance Self Esteem, Confidence, Motivation & Enthusiasm
To enjoy your Best Life
Relieve Anxiety
To improve your Quality of Life
Enhance Self Esteem, Confidence, Motivation & Enthusiasm
To enjoy your Best Life
Relieve: Pain, Calm Anxiety, Soothe IBS,
Fear of Surgery
Increase: Self Esteem, Confidence, Motivation,
Discover: Why you self-sabotage (subconscious secondary gain) and resolve it so that you can reach your goals without willpower
In any given week, in England alone, 6 in 100 people will be diagnosed with generalised anxiety disorder (Mind).
In the UK, over 8 million people are experiencing an anxiety disorder at any one time (Mental Health UK)
Less than 50% of people with generalised anxiety disorder access treatment (Mental Health Foundation)
A 2023 study found:
60% of employees are experiencing anxiety
67% of employees aged 16-24 are experiencing anxiety
66% of employees aged 25-34 are experiencing anxiety
65% of females are experiencing anxiety
And Yet… Only 10% of employees are seeking mental health support.
Why is this?
You worked hard to get to where you are:
Perhaps you do not want your employer to know you feel anxious or stressed because you are concerned about how ‘’A difficult patch right now” could affect your entire future career once it is in your HR records?
Perhaps you are concerned that you will be asked if you have ever had any ‘Mental Health’ problems on formal documents like insurance, pension, private health, or mortgage applications?
Do you tell yourself “It’s just a bit of anxiety and stress, isn’t it? So why mess up my future?”
Perhaps shame, fear of appearing weak, or embarrassment are among the reasons that you do not want colleagues, friends or family members to know that you are feeling so bad.
Are you pushing yourself even harder to keep up with them?
Are your trying to live up to their expectations of you?
Are you trying to live up to your expectations of yourself?
Perhaps you think the way you are feeling is normal, or that everyone is anxious?
Well, it is NOT normal, BUT.. it is surprisingly common,
especially among Professionals and Students close to “Burnout”
You do NOT have to feel like that
I can help you
What if…
You could find a way to calm down all that old anxiety and stress and step into motivation, clarity and focus whenever you choose to?
How would it be if, when you DO have the physical energy, you knew how to give yourself a natural boost of
motivation, determination, self-confidence and self-esteem?
Would that be helpful?
Would you be living life from a far happier place if you could line up your physical, mental and emotional energy and get things done?
I can help you turn your ‘To Do’ list into a ‘Ta Daahh’ list
I remember talking about my anxiety at my friend’s house over 20 years ago
She told me to ‘Relax’… But I kept telling her that I couldn’t ‘Relax…’
I had no idea how to ‘Relax … ‘
I had no idea how to come away from being on high alert
because of the constant fear about everything that was going on around me…
That state of living in constant fear is how I came into the world of hypnotherapy.
From there, I have helped many people like me and you, for many years
It is why I always offer my Signature Relaxation Training free of charge
To help everyone who is feeling overwhelmed by the physical sensations of anxiety.
As far as I am concerned:
No One, Anywhere, should have to live with those feelings day after day
Some people think hypnosis is about giving up control but actually,
Hypnotherapy is all about giving YOU back control and focus
So that you can calm anxiety, and unwanted thoughts and behaviours – like self-sabotage
Changing them for contentment, happiness, confidence, enthusiasm and motivation
Of course, there are other ways to do all this, but hypnotherapy just makes things faster, easier and is far more gentle
Calm, Relaxed and Confident – Despite Anxiety
If you have had enough of physically feeling the emotional sensations of anxiety deep inside your body…
If your fear and indecision is freezing you, keeping you in a fogged, unfocussed state so you can’t make any decisions to work out how to change your life,
If you are wasting hours each day because of brain fog, indecision, second guessing yourself and procrastination…
I can help you learn how to Calm Anxiety for yourself right now.
AND …. IF YOU
Choose to learn and practise the sequence I show you, then you will be able to
Calm Anxiety whenever it triggers your perfectly human nervous system’s stress response.
Specialist Hypnotherapy and Coaching Service
I help people with distressing anxiety, long term illnesses, disabilities, and chronic pain, to calm all the extra, unnecessary anxiety in their lives.Together we create a new path, a new direction, that helps you to manage your day to day pressures and the commitments and responsibilities you cannot simply leave aside.
Anxiety is Exhausting.
It wears you down mentally and emotionally, as well as making you feel physically dreadful, so you end up in a vicious cycle of anxiety, fear, panic, dread and overwhelm. It can become too tired to work out how to deal with the underlying problems that are causing your anxiety so those thoughts and problems all whirl around in your head at night, while your brain is trying to sort things out, looking for solutions.
This results in you being unable to sleep or you wake up in a panic state….
Avoiding Things
Once anxiety has a hold on you, you might start to avoid things like school, exams, job interviews, asking people out on dates, being best man at your friend’s wedding (giving that speech!), giving presentations at work, even avoiding promotions. Some people can’t even walk into a restaurant or café on their own to meet other people, and they get to the point that they decline invitations and stay at home.
Then we try to protect ourselves with Self-Sabotage
We start self-sabotaging so we can feel a bit better ‘in the moment’ with a dopamine hit and our brain keeps us safely stuck right where we are... which is what is familiar. Self-sabotage is when we self-medicate with something like food, alcohol, smoking, drugs, cutting, sex, arguing, fighting, overspending, over exercising, staying in bed for far too long, scrolling our phone for hours, binge watching TV and even working too many hours!
But while we self-sabotage, we are staying safe.
This is the ultimate example of Subconscious Secondary Gain
The greatest example of Secondary Gain is when your own brain creates the overwhelming physical sensations of
severe anxiety, fear, dread and panic in your body so effectively that
It freezes you and stops you doing something!
Your subconscious is always on your side, and is simply protecting YOU from what it “thinks” is a deeper fear, a deeper threat, one you may not even be aware of.
This is Secondary Gain.
Your brain, your subconscious, has only one job and that is survival.
Its job is to keep you safe. It doesn’t really care how it does that, so distracting you with food or wine or sex or shopping or cigarettes, or cleaning, or counting things over and over again… It is all effective.. As long as you don’t change!
Equally, simply making you feel so awful you are frozen, and can barely move, scared to leave the house, or drive a car, or even leave that abusive relationship, is a win for the brain. You aren’t doing anything too drastic to change things and as far as the brain is concerned:
Being uncomfortable where you currently are…
Is better than being unsafe In the great ‘unknown’ –
that even more scary place called “Change”
Where it doesn’t know what to do.
This is why people don’t successfully “Change” until they have absolutely had enough of their present situation,
or, their situation is so dangerous they no longer have the freedom of choice.
Staying safe is, of course, the secondary gain of Self-sabotage.
The phrase ‘Secondary Gain’ has been bandied around for decades as a derogatory term.
However, your brain is subconsciously protecting you from something it views as a bigger threat than the ‘surface fear’ you think you have….…BUT
It is possible that the threat is no longer even relevant.
It may have been relevant when you were a child, but now you are an adult you are safe.
It may not even be ‘your’ fear.
Your subconscious may even have heard conversations about fear and taken it on as it’s own fear!
You are likely to self-sabotage until you calm your bigger fear - the subconscious root of the Secondary Gain.
For that, we need a subconscious solution – Clinical Hypnotherapy.
In my program, we don’t conveniently shy away from talking about Secondary Gains.
We actively look for your areas of self-sabotage and potential subconscious secondary gain.
We use powerful clinical hypnotherapy to calm those areas,
because hypnotherapy is fast and reliable and much easier for you.
Session 1
We all experience anxiety differently.
Understand how your brain registers anxiety and how it creates that cascade of stress hormones within your body.
Tune in to your own personal experiences of anxiety and happiness.
Learn how to manage the thoughts in your own head so that you can balance your emotional and physical reactions.
Understand how anxiety is triggered so that you can understand and learn various way to ‘un trigger and counteract’ the effects of it by purposefully triggering your PNS
Learn how to manage the thoughts in your own head so that you can balance your feelings and remain calm, relaxed and in control of your emotional state, so that you have more time to choose your responses to what is happening around you, at any moment, no matter what has triggered you.
Session 2
Learn how to uncover and question your deepest, oldest subconscious beliefs (many from childhood).
Knock out old unhelpful beliefs and renew your values and beliefs for positive, life enhancing ones, so that everything is congruently lined up for you to move ahead with a new sense of purpose.
Feel Calm, Relaxed and Confident as you can now stop self-sabotage and see yourself enjoying the journey into your future with much higher self-esteem, motivation, excitement and resilience.Understand your personal triggers and increase your self-worth so that other peoples’ behaviours and actions no longer affect
your emotional mood. new destination.
Calm, Relaxed, Confident – Despite Anxiety.
Session 3
Learn how to enjoy a feeling of Genuine Confidence, all the time, in every situation.
Confidence is simply a feeling that is created by our own thoughts in our own head.
It is just as much a “Habit” as Anxiety.
For Genuine, Calm, Reassured, Competent Confidence, you need two things.
That’s it.
This session will show you how to feel good about yourself and have Genuine Confidence – Calm Relaxed Confident - DespiteAnxiety..
Session 4
Learn how to feel comfortable and confident in social situations including giving presentations.
Discover your new life’s purpose and choose the lifestyle path that is true to who you really are, right now.
Set out in that new direction, discovering the steps to take along the way, with confidence, motivation, enthusiasm, determination, resilience, high self-esteem, joy, peace, happiness and knowing exactly how to Focus on reaching the place you want to be – starting out with new levels of happiness, and enjoying the journey to your new destination.
Calm, Relaxed, Confident – Despite Anxiety.
Appointment Fees
I have made this program as accessible to everyone as possible by offering online group sessions. All sessions are live with me and each step builds upon the previous one. You will need to practice the techniques I show you between your sessions before the next step. Of course you can keep your camera off, change your name and you don't have to speak, alternatively choose to have private sessions with me.
Please do not apply to join a group program if you know you will miss sessions.
The small group program
Max 8 people per group
You can keep your camera off
You can change your on-screen name
You do not have to talk
If you are interested in working with me privately, please contact me for a place
4 Private Appointments
. Chronic pain relief
. Fear of pain before surgery, biopsies, or
dental work
. IBS
. Slow Parkinson’s Tremors
. Coming to terms with shock diagnosis,
accidents, sadness, fear, overwhelm.
. Help planning a ‘different future'
FAQs
Will I lose control under Hypnosis?
Hypnosis is an “altered, relaxed, state of consciousness that is characterised by the bypassing of the critical faculties and increased susceptibility to suggestion”. When a person is under hypnosis, suggestions don’t pass through the critical faculties of normal consciousness. Instead, they enter the subconscious mind directly. Then, if these suggestions are accepted by the subconscious mind, the hypnotised person acts on them. However, the phrase “if these suggestions are accepted……” is key. Hypnosis can not make you do anything that you do not want to do, or that is contrary to your moral or ethical values. You are in control at all times, you always know what is happening, and you can come out of the altered state at any time. Hypnosis will not make you unresponsive, lose your memory, lose control or reveal secrets.
How effective is Hypnosis?
Hypnotherapy is a highly effective, scientifically proven therapy, however, it also depends on your motivation and desire to change. You need to work alongside me and follow the full program of therapy, which includes practising the mindset exercises if you want to be able to continue to manage your physical reactions to stressful situations in the future.
Cancellation Policy
My standard policy is that I require at least 48 hours notice of change to appointment time. If 24- 48 hours notice is given then 50% of the normal fee will be charged. If less than 24 hours notice is given then 100% of the normal fee will be charged. Having said that I recognise that challenging situations sometimes occur in life and my priority is always to treat people fairly and to try to re-arrange sessions. In the case of last minute cancellation or need to re-arrange, please call as soon as you can. Please do not book onto group programs if you will miss sessions. Recordings may not be available because of privacy and confidentiality.
What if I miss a group session?
Each session builds upon the previous session and you need to practice the techniques I show you before the following session. Please book a program you will be able to attend. I cannot guarantee recordings of group sessions because of confidentiality. The group program already includes one private session with me and I can run through the session you missed if that occurs before the private session has been taken.
Is this a cure for Fibromyalgia?
No, at present there is no long term medical cure for Fibromyalgia. I am not ‘removing’ Fibromyalgia, just as I cannot ‘re-grow’ a limb for my clients who have had life-changing accidents. You will still have your diagnosis. However, there are many ways to ease and soothe the collection of symptoms that together are called ‘Fibromyalgia’. I have gathered the techniques that have worked best to ease my own varied, fluctuating symptoms of Fibromyalgia over the past 20 years and have created this program because there are so many people living alongside symptoms of Fibromyalgia. Most of these people probably don’t’ have 20 years to try all the things I tried!
How does the program work?
This program uses hypnotherapy relieve pain and soothe the symptoms of Fibromyalgia and anxiety. It then teaches you ways to calmly manage stress to reduce and prevent Flare Ups which will improve your Quality of Life in the long term. Once calm, and no longer distracted by pain, you can choose a new lifestyle that fits your life stage perfectly and I train you in ways to increase self-esteem, confidence, motivation and enthusiasm, so that you can enjoy living your Best Life. Calm, Relaxed, Confident – Despite Fibromyalgia
Why is controlling our reaction to stress and anxiety such an important part of this program?
Everyone who has Fibromyalgia knows that a lot of extra stress and anxiety will lead to a Fibromyalgia Flare up – more pain and worse symptoms. The Flare doesn’t necessarily happen immediately but in a day or two when there is seemingly no connection. That is why people say they will ‘pay for it later’. This program reduces pain and other symptoms of Fibromyalgia AND teaches you how to manage stress and anxiety so that you can reduce the frequency and severity of Fibromyalgia Flares in the future.
Do you offer a payment plan?
I accept payments by PayPal because they offer a PayPal Credit facility that you can set up before you book in with me.
Can you help me stop smoking?
No, I don’t specialise in that area. I have a colleague I recommend who has an excellent track record for smoking cessation. I regularly recommend people to colleagues who specialise in other areas of hypnotherapy.
Frequently Asked Questions For Stephanie
Is Stephanie ‘cured’?
No, not from everything but I have other diagnoses as well as Fibromyalgia.
Did these therapies enable Stephanie to get her life back on track without pain and brain fog?
Yes.
Does Stephanie still need to use these techniques on a daily basis?
Sometimes, yes, that’s the whole point of the program. If I hear or see something that triggers my brain into starting my autonomic nervous system’s stress reaction, I need to calm it down by using these techniques. None of us know what we will see and hear each day that will trigger us.
Does Stephanie still have hypnotherapy sessions?
YES, I have excellent colleagues who help me sometimes. I recommend them to clients who ask for help with issues I do not work with, like smoking cessation, weight loss, phobias etc.
Stephanie Cavendish BA(Hons) CHt, Tft-Adv
Certified Hypnotherapist since 2008
©2023 Calm Relaxed Confident